In today’s onlife world, technology has seamlessly integrated into our daily lives. The rapid advancements in technology, coupled with the pervasive ubiquitous nature of the internet, necessitate that parents approach their child’s introduction to technology with care and caution. Although some parents choose to delay their child’s access to technology, believing it will shield them from online dangers and inappropriate content, this cautious approach may unintentionally expose them to increased vulnerability and risk in today’s onlife world.
We firmly believe, based on our experience combined with evidence-based research, that when parents postpone a child’s introduction to a balanced and “age-appropriate” use of technology, they inadvertently overlook a significant chance to empower their child with vital digital literacy skills for safely navigating today’s onlife world at an early age. Nonetheless, it remains equally true that exposing young individuals to technology that is in-appropriate for their age can also expose them to increased risks, creating a digital Yin/Yang dilemma.
Now, some will ask – what is our opinion specific to “age appropriate” vs “age in-appropriate” use of technology? Broadly, the ownership/use of a fusion phone (iPhone or Android) by a pre-teen or younger teen would be one example of age in-appropriate use, while the ownership/use of a minimalist phone (WisePhone or PinWheel Phone) would be one example of age-appropriate use. (1)
In a world that is becoming more interconnected by the day, the importance of digital literacy cannot be overstated for children, as it enables them to develop resilience and flourish academically, socially, and professionally as they transition into young adulthood. By offering supervised and guided exposure to technology that aligns with their age and developmental stage, parents can play a crucial role in fostering their child’s resilience and instilling a process that involves critical thinking, digital literacy, and responsible behavior online.
It’s a parent’s responsibility to shield their child from potential online dangers. However, solely relying on delaying their access to technology as the main approach to address these risks does not ensure their safety. In fact, this strategy can result in what is known as the “Nirvana Fallacy” and give parents a false sense of security (2).
“If I don’t allow my child to have access to technology, the internet, or online gaming inside our home, then the threats associated no longer become an issue.”
However, adopting such an approach can sometimes expose children, who are not familiar with the online world, to increased vulnerability when they eventually (and inevitably) gain access to the internet outside of the home. Without adequate digital literacy, combined with parental guidance and experience, they may lack the necessary knowledge and skills to recognize risks, safeguard their personal information, and navigate potentially dangerous situations.
As an example – Darren, during his 30-year policing career, witnessed a distressing pattern while working with young pre-teen and early teen survivors of sexual assault. It was dishearteningly common for many of these very young survivors to have fallen prey to sexual abuse, primarily due to their inability to recognize the threat. The reason – often parents who, in an attempt to protect their child, avoided age-appropriate discussions about consensual healthy human sexuality with their child. Paradoxically, this avoidance inadvertently made their child more vulnerable to becoming targets by someone who they, and the parent or caregiver, often knew, loved, or trusted. The decision to “delay” such discussions was in fact the very key element that exposed them to risk.
It is crucial to remember that knowledge, and the understanding and application of that knowledge, combined with hands on guided experience in the use of age-appropriate technology, hold immense power in protecting our children in today’s onlife world.
By initiating age-appropriate conversations about technology, combined with age-appropriate access, you empower your child with knowledge, awareness, and the ability to recognize potential dangers in today’s onlife world both inside, but more importantly outside the home. Engaging in open dialogue and firsthand experience equips them with the emotional, psychological, physical, and social tools they need to protect themselves and make informed decisions. It allows a parent or caregiver to provide guidance based on your family values, ethics, and beliefs, ensuring that your child receives accurate information from a trusted source, rather than their friend who will likely have access to age in-appropriate technology that your child will be drawn to.
Remember, being proactive does not mean prematurely exposing your child to technology that is not age appropriate. It means taking the necessary steps to introduce age-appropriate technology and digital literacy discussions to gradually expanding their understanding as they grow and digitally mature. Yes, this take work on the part of the parent or caregiver, but we believe the key is to adapt your approach to technology based on your child’s developmental stage, using language and examples that are suitable for their age and maturity level. This is something that we here at the White Hatter teach parents and caregivers to do (3).
Delaying access to technology can also isolate children from their peers and hinder their ability to connect and engage in the digital spaces where their friends and classmates are present. This social isolation may inadvertently make them more susceptible to exploitation, peer pressure, and feelings of exclusion when they eventually gain access to technology. By delaying access, parents and caregivers may inadvertently increase the desire of their child to explore the onlife world outside the home unsupervised to find connection and community, again increasing risk.
By delaying a child’s exposure to technology, parents may miss the opportunity to teach them about online safety, including strategies for handling cyberbullying and reporting inappropriate behavior. It is essential to educate children on responsible online behavior, digital literacy, and developing a healthy balance in today’s onlife world. Delaying access to technology can deny children the chance to develop these resiliency skills, potentially leaving them more vulnerable to online threats. Proper pre-planning prevents digitally poor performance, both in the present and into the future – avoidance does not!
Technology is rapidly evolving, and it plays an increasingly significant role in our daily lives. By delaying a child’s access to age-appropriate technology, parents inadvertently limit their exposure to valuable learning experiences and skill development opportunities. The future is today, technological fluency will be a prerequisite for many career paths and personal endeavors. Delaying access may hinder a child’s ability to adapt and thrive in a world where technology is now ubiquitous.
As a parent or caregiver, taking a proactive stance when addressing sensitive topics with your child brings numerous benefits. By shaping the narrative, providing accurate information, and fostering an open environment, you empower your child to make informed decisions to protect themselves both inside and outside the home. By doing so, you also become a trusted source of knowledge and support for your child, creating a strong foundation for their emotional and physical well-being.
We instinctively seek to protect our children from the dangers of the onlife world. However, delaying their access to technology until a certain age can inadvertently lead to unintended consequences, ultimately increasing their vulnerability and exposure to risks. Instead of completely avoiding technology, we propose a more effective approach – actively guiding and supervising our children’s digital experiences by paving the way for them. Rather than solely focusing on delaying access, we suggest gradually introducing age-appropriate technology while maintaining open and effective communication, active engagement, and ongoing supervision. By doing so, we empower our children with the necessary skills and knowledge to navigate the online world with greater resiliency, safety, and security. In today’s interconnected world, striking a “Goldilocks” balance—finding the right amount and appropriate use of technology is essential. Such an approach reduces vulnerability and risk mentioned in this article, while also equipping our children to flourish in today’s onlife world.
Digital Food For Thought
The White Hatter
References:
1/ https://thewhitehatter.ca/blog/smartphones-redefining-mobile-phones-for-both-parents-caregivers/
3/ https://thewhitehatter.ca/blog/a-transformational-approach-to-parenting-in-todays-onlife-world/
Other Related Articles From The White Hatter:
“Utilizing Technology as a Digital Pacifier, Digital Babysitter, or Distraction Device During Early Adolescents: Concerns to Be Aware Of” https://thewhitehatter.ca/blog/utilizing-technology-as-a-digital-pacifier-digital-babysitter-or-distraction-device-during-early-adolescence-concerns-to-be-aware-of/
“It’s Not About “No” Tech, It’s All About “Know” Tech When It Comes To Our Kids” https://thewhitehatter.ca/blog/its-not-about-no-tech-its-all-about-know-tech-when-it-comes-to-our-kids/
“Parents and Caregivers: How to Help Mediate Youth Technology & Social Media Dilemmas” https://thewhitehatter.ca/blog/parents-and-caregivers-how-to-help-mediate-youth-technology-social-media-dilemmas/
“Does Technology + Social Media = Mental Health Issues For All Youth? We Need To Reframe the Question” https://thewhitehatter.ca/blog/does-technology-social-media-mental-health-issues-for-all-youth-we-need-to-reframe-the-question/
