Caveat: The gaming platform discussed here has a Terms of Service (TOS) that requires players to be at least 13 years old. However, a valid criticism is whether the platform effectively verifies the age of their users (a whole different discussion from a privacy standpoint) to ensure compliance to help minimize risks to youth?
While technology can offer educational benefits and entertainment, we also acknowledge it can present significant risks, including online grooming and exploitation, particularly for children under 13. A recent Canadian incident involving a child groomed on Fortnite should spark a crucial and uncomfortable conversation about parental responsibility in today’s online world.
The Case at Hand
CTV News, July 9, 2024 – “U.S. Man Charged With Luring 10-year-old Ontario Child Over Fortnite”
A 10-year-old Ontario child was groomed while playing Fortnite, a popular online game with an age requirement of 13. Despite this, the child had a fully functional smartphone with unrestricted internet access and minimal parental supervision, if any. This unfortunate situation raises an important and often controversial question – should parents share some responsibility when their child falls victim to online dangers? Some of our followers might not agree, but we believe that, unfortunately, “sometimes” the answer maybe yes.
Here are the essential elements disclosed publicly by the police in this case:
- A 51-year-old offender targeted a 10-year-old child in Ontario.
- 10-year-old had their own smartphone
- The child accessed the Fortnite gaming platform unsupervised via their cellphone, where the grooming began.
- The parent discovered their child had a cellphone bill of $6,000, leading to the uncovering of the crime.
- Once trust was built with the offender, the child provided their cellphone number to them.
- Phone calls and text messages ensued, where sexualized pictures were sent.
- The offender threatened to send the pictures to the parents if more pictures were not provided.
The principles of this story are something that we have seen time and time again in our field of work.
While the primary blame for grooming and exploitation lies with the offender, parents also play a critical role in protecting their children from such threats. It is a well-known fact, that is supported in the research, providing a young child with unrestricted internet access without supervision can significantly increase their vulnerability online, especially when it comes to online predation and sexual exploitation. (1)
Being Your Child’s Best Parent, Not Their Best Friend
It’s natural for parents to want to be their child’s best friend, especially regarding technology and online activities. However, it’s crucial to prioritize being a responsible parent over being a friend. This means setting and enforcing rules that might not always be popular with your child but are essential for their safety. As we have promoted for years – “The right tech at the right time.” Unfortunately, based on the public disclosure by police, this appears not to have happened in this case.
The internet can be a valuable resource for children, offering opportunities for learning and connection in a balanced age-appropriate way utilizing age-appropriate technology. However, it also requires careful navigation and responsible parental supervision. While children must learn to interact safely online, parents have the primary role in guiding and shepherding them, especially for those under the age of 13 years.
Remember, being a parent means sometimes making tough decisions that prioritize your child’s well-being over their immediate happiness. When it comes to technology, strive to be your child’s best parent, not just their best friend. Yes, social media and gaming platforms have a significant role in ensuring the safety of our kids on their platforms, a fact that some are willfully ignoring in our opinion. However, parents undeniably play the most crucial role in guiding and supervising their children’s use of technology. Therefore, there are times when parents have to bear some responsibility when things go badly online, especially when kids are given the wrong tech at the wrong time by the parent or caregiver.
This posting is about stressing that as parents and caregivers, we have a responsibility we cannot ignore regarding our children’s use of technology. It’s crucial for parents to recognize the vital role they play in guiding and supervising their kids’ online activities. Ignoring this responsibility, by providing a child with the wrong tech at the wrong time, can lead to serious consequences, including exposure to inappropriate content and online predators, as appears to have happened in the case that inspired this article.
Being proactive about our children’s digital lives means setting boundaries, having open conversations about online safety, and staying informed about the apps and websites they use. Again, it’s about age-appropriate access with age-appropriate technology – “the right tech at the right time.” In essence, it’s about being actively involved and not turning a blind eye to the well-known challenges and risks that come with modern technology, that we and others have been speaking too for the past 15 year!
We can’t simply blame technology and social media vendors for all the issues; as parents and caregivers, we also need to take responsibility and reflect on our own role in addressing these challenges as well. Be your child’s best parent rather than being their best friend when it comes to technology and the onlife world, it can make a huge difference on keeping your child safer.
Digital Food For Thought
The White Hatter
References:
1/ https://thewhitehatter.ca/online-sexual-predation-and-exploitation/