We’ve read the headlines such as, “How tech created a recipe for loneliness”. Social media is often portrayed as a force driving teenagers into isolation, replacing in-person relationships with shallow digital interactions. However, research and real-world experiences tell a different story, teens are not using social media as a substitute for face-to-face friendships, other than during COVID, but as a tool to enhance and maintain them.
Rather than withdrawing into online worlds at the expense of real-life relationships, it has been our experience in presenting to over 655,000 students, most teens today are using social media platforms like Snapchat, Instagram, or messaging apps to stay connected with their friends in meaningful ways. These platforms serve as extensions of their offline interactions, allowing them to share experiences, make plans, and stay engaged with each other’s lives even when they are apart.
A 2022 Pew Research Center study found that 80% of teens say social media makes them feel more connected to what’s going on in their friends’ lives, and 67% say these platforms make them feel like they have people who support them through tough times. (1) Instead of replacing real-world interactions, social media is often a bridge that helps strengthen and maintain friendships outside of school or extracurricular activities.
Contrary to what some believe and promote, social media is not an alternative to in-person gatherings; it is often a key facilitator. Many teens use messaging apps and social media platforms to coordinate plans, invite friends to hang out, or share updates about upcoming events. Whether it’s arranging a study session, planning a group outing, or even deciding what movie to watch, these platforms make logistics easier and ensure everyone is in the loop.
Social media and tech allows teens to continue conversations that started in person. A discussion made in class about weekend plans can continue seamlessly online. This ongoing communication strengthens relationships rather than diminishing their depth.
For many teens, social media is an essential tool for maintaining friendships across distances. Whether a friend moves to another city or they attend different schools, digital connections allow them to stay in touch in ways that would have been difficult in previous generations. Voice chats, video calls, and even shared gaming experiences allow for ongoing interactions that keep friendships alive, despite physical separation.
Beyond just keeping in touch, social media offers teens an additional layer of emotional support. When dealing with stress, anxiety, or personal struggles, they often turn to their close friends online for advice and reassurance. This digital presence can provide comfort during times when in-person support isn’t immediately available.
While social media serves as a vital tool for connection, balance is key. Healthy online interactions should complement, not replace, face-to-face engagement. Encouraging teens to use social media mindfully, ensuring they also engage in offline activities, and fostering open discussions about digital well-being are all important aspects of guiding responsible usage.
However, we acknowledge that there are also times when social media and technology can be weaponized to purposely ghost or isolate a youth or teen as a form of cyberbullying. (2) This can take the form of exclusion from group chats, deliberately ignoring messages, or orchestrating mass unfollowing campaigns to make the target feel invisible. Unlike traditional bullying, which may be more overt, this digital form of isolation can be insidious, leaving no direct evidence but having a profound emotional impact. The victim may experience anxiety, depression, and a sense of worthlessness, especially when they see their peers interacting online while they are deliberately left out. Because social media plays such a central role in teen social life, being digitally erased can feel just as painful as in-person exclusion, if not worse.
The belief that social media is replacing real-world friendships oversimplifies how today’s teens interact. Instead of isolating themselves, they are using these digital tools to enhance their connections, stay involved in their friend’s lives, and maintain strong relationships even when they are apart. Rather than demonizing social media, recognizing its role as a bridge to in-person interactions allows for a more balanced and informed discussion about its place in modern teen friendships.
Digital Food For Thought
The White Hatter
Facts Not Fear, Facts Not Emotions, Enlighten Not Frighten, Know Tech Not No Tech
References:
2/ https://thewhitehatter.ca/cyberbullying-digital-peer-aggression/
