In today’s onlife world, technology’s influence on children is a hot topic, sparking debates about who is responsible for mitigating its potential harms. During a recent online discussion we had with others, a participant shared a scenario illustrating their concern on how technology is hijacking our kid’s attention and therefore rewiring their brain – while hiking, they observed a 5-year-old girl in a stroller completely engrossed in a cartoon on her father’s phone, seemingly oblivious to the natural beauty around her. This anecdote was used to highlight the supposed negative effects of technology on a child’s development – everyone in this thread echoed this concern.
In response, we challenged the narrative and stated:
“How is this technology’s fault? Isn’t the real issue the parent using the device as a digital pacifier?” (1)
This response wasn’t to say that technology companies shouldn’t be held accountable. Regulation and legislation requiring safety-by-design policies and imposing penalties for non-compliance are critically needed. However, the best legislation will fall short without active parent and caregiver compliance.
Research paints a clear picture of the gaps in parental responsibility when it comes to rules and following existing age-gating Terms Of Service (TOS) requirements. A report from Australia’s eSafety Commissioner revealed (2):
- 90% of parents helped children under 13 set up social media accounts, directly violating platform terms of service when it came to age restrictions.
- 58% of parents allowed their children to access social media through their own accounts, bypassing safety measures and age restrictions.
Anecdotally, we have seen the same thing here in Canada!
These statistics demonstrate that even with rules and regulations, many parents and caregivers disregard safeguards, undermining efforts to protect children from online harm. When harm does occur, some of these same parents are quick to point their finger at the technology and social media platform that they helped their child access in clear violation of the Terms of Service.
The challenges associated with technology use and our kids cannot be placed solely on social media vendors or legislation. Parents and caregivers must play a proactive role in ensuring their children’s online safety. Ignoring this onlife responsibility creates an incomplete approach to addressing digital risks and harms. (3) Sadly, this is something that we have seen time and time again as online invesitgators.
Legislation is essential, but it’s only one piece of the puzzle. Social media companies should absolutely be required to adopt safety-by-design principles, and governments must enforce these standards. However, these measures will fail without engaged and informed parenting.
The term “onlife parenting” captures the idea that the online and offline worlds are interconnected. Parents must embrace this integration, taking an active role in their children’s digital lives.
- Learn about the platforms, apps, and games your children use to understand potential risks and benefits. We, and others, offer tons of free resources to help parents and caregivers with this need.
- Establish rules for when and where devices can be used, especially in public or family settings where engagement is more meaningful.
- Demonstrate balanced technology use by putting devices away during family time, model good digital literacy, and prioritizing face-to-face interactions off-line.
Blaming tech companies alone for digital challenges is an oversimplification. Real change requires a partnership – regulation ensures accountability from social media vendors, while parents take responsibility for their children’s online habits through the use of age and developmentally appropriate technology.
Yes, overwhelmed parents deserve compassion and support, but that doesn’t negate their role in navigating these challenges. It’s about more than assigning blame – it’s about recognizing parental responsibility. (4)
To keep kids safer online, parents and caregivers must become proactive participants in their children’s digital lives. Digital literacy education and onlife parenting are the keystones of a holistic strategy.
Legislation can set the stage, but the most impactful changes happen at home. By fostering a culture of shared responsibility, we can create an environment where technology, regulation, and parenting coexist to help children thrive in a connected world.
When parents take ownership of their role in digital literacy and safety, they equip their children with the tools to navigate technology responsibly. This proactive approach not only reduces the risks associated with online harm but also helps children develop critical thinking skills, resilience, and a balanced relationship with technology.
The challenges of the onlife world are complex, but they are not insurmountable. With shared responsibility, compassion, and active participation from all stakeholders, we can build a future where children are not just protected but empowered to thrive in an ever-evolving onlife world. However, parents and caregivers will always be the keystone to keeping our kids safer – no matter if it is online or offline.
Be your child’s best parent rather than their best friend when it comes to the use of technology and the Internet – there is a difference!
Digital Food For Thought
The White Hatter
Facts Not Fear, Facts Not Emotions, Enlighten Not Frighten, Know Tech Not No Tech
References
2/ https://www.npr.org/2024/12/19/nx-s1-5231020/australia-top-regulator-kids-social-media-ban
