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The Way We Discuss The Challenges Of The Manosphere, Incels, and Online Radicalization with Youth and Teens Matter!

April 2, 2025

CAVEAT – This article was prompted by some online discussions among parents, caregivers, and even some educators suggesting that the Netflix series Adolescence (1) should be shown in classrooms as a teaching tool to educate students about the manosphere, incels, and online radicalization. At The White Hatter, we strongly disagree with this idea, and in this article, we explain  why. We want to also acknowledge those professionals, who work with at risk youth who have helped us understand some of the concerns surrounding Adolescence as a teaching aid in classrooms. We would especially like to thank Richard Pomfrett, a UK digital literacy and online safety advocate who runs a program called “Boyz-2-Men” (2) and Catherine Knibbs, a UK based Online Harms Consultant, Trainer, Speaker, Author, and Psychotherapist (3) who works with at risk youth. Both Richard and Catherine are professional in this field of study, and reviewed a draft of this important article to make sure we weren’t out in left field in some of our thoughts.  

In today’s onlife world, concerns about the manosphere, Incels, and online radicalization are understandable and have become more pronounced given the Netflix series Adolescence. However, when discussions disproportionately portray teenage boys as a “problem group”, as if they are inherently prone to hateful behaviour or harmful attitudes, it can have unintended consequences that weaken the very message we seek to convey. While addressing and preventing toxic gender dynamics is crucial, an excessive focus on boys as a demographic in need of correction can lead to backlash, misinterpretation, and disengagement, especially when the vast majority teen boys do not subscribe to these ideologies. This is especially true when the research supports that the risk of violence, as portrayed in Adolescence, although a reality, is very much a rarity. (4)

It has been our experience that when boys feel unfairly labeled or singled out, they are more likely to react defensively. If they perceive that they are being preemptively warned against behaviours they have not engaged in, they may feel resentment rather than reflection. This phenomenon, often referred to as the “backlash effect,” (5) can lead to young men tuning out critical conversations or, worse, pushing back against the messages altogether. When students feel attacked or unjustly categorized, their natural response is to disengage or challenge authority, which runs counter to the goal of education and awareness – something that influencers in the manosphere will use to their advantage. (6)

Another unintended consequence of framing this as only a teen boy issue, students may misread the intended message. If classroom discussions highlight negative behaviours primarily in boys, young women may not see themselves reflected in these lessons, even when those same harmful behaviours exist in different forms among girls. (7). This not only distorts the intent of the lesson but also allows some harmful behaviours to go unexamined simply because they don’t fit the narrative. 

The way issues are presented in an educational setting carries implicit messages that can influence how students perceive themselves and their peers. When students are “shown something to learn a lesson,” the lesson can feel punitive rather than instructive or thought provoking. This approach can be especially counterproductive when dealing with heated or emotionally charged topics such as those discussed in this article. If a classroom discussion escalates in ways that are difficult for educators to control, students may leave the lesson feeling more polarized than informed. This is why it is so important that educators become more informed about these topics, before engaging in any kind of discussions with students about them.

Instead of framing adolescent boys as a demographic in need of special attention, educators and parents should focus on fostering discussions that encourage critical thinking, empathy, and shared responsibility by all students. (8) One of the most effective ways to do this is to present issues in a gender-inclusive way. Discussions about harmful behaviours, online radicalization, or bullying should include examples from both male and female perspectives. This ensures that all students see themselves in the conversation and recognize shared responsibility rather than feeling singled out. When students understand that negative behaviours are not inherently linked to one gender, they are more likely to engage in self-reflection and accountability.

Avoiding prescriptive narratives is another crucial element in ensuring productive discussions. Instead of presenting material in a way that implies “this is what you need to avoid,” educators should frame discussions around open-ended questions that encourage students to think critically about their choices and values. When students feel that their perspectives are valued rather than dictated, they are more likely to participate meaningfully in conversations about ethical behaviour and decision-making.

This is why peer-led discussions can also be a valuable tool in addressing these topics effectively. Young people often respond more positively to discussions led by their peers or guided by mentors they respect. Encouraging open dialogue rather than top-down instruction can help mitigate defensive reactions. Youth and teens have a lot to offer us as adults, we adults just need to be willing to listen. As Richard stated to me in an email, “We need to put young people in the centre of this debate and engage them, on their level and include them in these important, critical conversation.”

Another essential component is emphasizing positive role models. Highlighting examples of young men and women who use their influence for good can help counteract the perception that teens are inherently at risk of problematic behaviour. Showcasing examples of kindness, leadership, and integrity provides a more balanced perspective and offers teens aspirational figures who demonstrate ethical decision-making. When positive reinforcement is integrated into these discussions, young people are more likely to aspire toward constructive behaviour rather than feel burdened by negative stereotypes.

Note- in her review of this article, Catherine Knibbs brought up an interesting point that I never thought about, “the LGBTQ+ community will totally not see themselves in any of this ‘education’ because well they don’t fit the incel group or otherwise. We often forget heteronormative doesn’t apply there and misses the mark and sadly this is where Adolescence made the world very binary on this issue! I hope Cath (soon to be Dr Knibbs – fingers crossed) will write about this challenge!

Ultimately, the goal of education is not just to warn but to empower. If we truly want to help young people navigate the complexities of adolescence, we must ensure that our messages do not inadvertently alienate them. By adopting a more inclusive and thoughtful approach, we can create an environment where both young men and women feel seen, respected, and encouraged to make ethical choices, not because they feel pressured to, but because they recognize the value in doing so. Thoughtfully constructed educational conversations can foster genuine self-awareness, ensuring that students leave with a deeper understanding of social dynamics rather than a sense of division or resentment.

For all the reasons noted above, we don’t believe that the series adolescence  would be a good pedagogical teaching aid in schools.

NOTE – There is also a proposal by the British Government to roll out Netflix’s Adolescence as an educational resource in secondary schools across the UK. As a result, psychologist Dr Jessica Taylor who specializes in trauma counselling and helping at risk youth, has now penned an open letter to her government asking that this proposal not be implemented into policy that echos some of what we have discussed in this article (9)

Digital Food For Thought

The White Hatter

Facts Not Fear, Facts Not Emotions, Enlighten Not Frighten, Know Tech Not No Tech

1/ https://thewhitehatter.ca/blog/should-you-and-your-child-watch-the-netflixs-series-adolescence-our-review/

2/ https://boyz-2-men.org.uk/ 

3/ https://www.childrenandtech.co.uk/about 

4/ https://thewhitehatter.ca/blog/teen-violence-technology-separating-fact-from-fiction-in-the-wake-of-the-netflix-series-adolescence/ 

5/ https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/30154168/

6/ https://thewhitehatter.ca/blog/the-contagion-effect-of-andrew-tate-on-youth-schools/ 

7/ https://thewhitehatter.ca/blog/more-than-just-boys-how-toxic-online-influencers-are-shaping-teen-girls-too/ 

8/ https://thewhitehatter.ca/blog/how-to-talk-about-concerns-surrounding-manosphere-messaging-with-teens-to-stimulate-critical-thinking-rather-than-resistance/ 

9/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/11bRIaC89byaiJiBdDZVig0Oq0rZUNdy_mLwlRvLErrA/edit?tab=t.0

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