In today’s onlife world, it is important for parents and caregivers to understand how social media platforms work, especially when it comes to the algorithms that control much of what we see and interact with online. Knowing how these algorithms operate, and how they can sometimes be used in ways that psychologists refer to as “dark patterns”, is critical to helping kids navigate social media in a safe and informed way.
At its core, an algorithm is simply a set of instructions or rules that a computer follows to perform a task. In the case of social media platforms, algorithms decide what content is shown to users, based on their past interactions and preferences. For example, if your child consistently likes, comments on, or shares posts about a particular topic, the algorithm will prioritize showing them more content related to that subject.
Algorithms aim to keep users engaged by curating content that appeals to their interests, which is why your child might find themselves endlessly scrolling through videos, memes, or posts that seem to be tailored just for them to things they like or are interested in. While algorithms can provide a personalized and enjoyable experience, they can also have unintended consequences, especially when combined with techniques designed to exploit human behavior. The challenge – these algorithms can pull youth or teens into a downward spiral, trapping them in a harmful cycle where they are repeatedly exposed to content that negatively impacts their emotional, psychological, and physical well-being – something commonly known as a negative feedback loop. This is why, in the United States, several civil lawsuits have been filed against companies like TikTok, alleging that their algorithms are contributing to self-harm and even suicide among youth and teens by promoting harmful content in their feeds.
Social media platforms use algorithms to filter and prioritize content. Every time a user interacts with content, whether it’s liking a post, watching a video, or even just lingering on a photo, the algorithm takes note. This data is then used to make predictions about what the user will enjoy in the future, creating a personalized feed that is constantly updated with new material.
While this might sound helpful, it can also be problematic. These platforms have a vested interest in keeping users on their apps for as long as possible. The longer a user stays engaged, the more ads they see, and the more money the platform makes. As a result, algorithms are often designed to maximize time spent on the app, which can lead to compulsive use, especially among teens.
Dark patterns refer to design features that manipulate users into doing something they may not want to do, like spending more time on an app, making a purchase, or giving away personal data. These tactics take advantage of psychological principles and behavioral tendencies, often without the user being fully aware of it.
Some common dark patterns on social media include:
- Infinite scrolling – Platforms use endless feeds to make it hard for users to stop scrolling. There’s no natural stopping point, which encourages more time spent on the app.
- Push notifications – Platforms send alerts that create a sense of urgency, even if the information is trivial, to keep users coming back.
- Likes and engagement metrics – Social media platforms use notifications for likes and comments to trigger a dopamine response, making users feel rewarded and pushing them to post more.
- Content prioritization – Platforms will often show posts with the highest engagement (even if controversial or negative) because they’re more likely to spark strong reactions and keep users engaged.
When combined with algorithms, dark patterns can amplify habituated usage, pulling users, especially young ones, deeper into the app and making it harder for them to disconnect.
So, how do we talk to our kids about algorithms and dark patterns?
- Talk to your kids about what algorithms and dark patterns are, and how they shape what they see online. Let them know that platforms are designed to keep their attention, often at the expense of their well-being.
- Teach your kids to question why certain content is being shown to them. Are they seeing it because it’s relevant, or because the platform thinks it will keep them scrolling longer?
- Talk about how of some online features and explain how platforms use these tricks to keep them engaged.
- Educate your kids and make them aware of the tactics that social media companies use to keep them hooked. Explain the concept of infinite scrolling, push notifications, and the ways platforms use psychological triggers to manipulate behavior.
- Algorithms rely heavily on personal data. Make sure your children understand the importance of protecting their personal information and being selective about what they share online.
As parents and caregivers, it’s important to recognize the role algorithms play in shaping our children’s social media experiences. While these algorithms can provide content that aligns with their interests, they can also lead to compulsive behaviors and exposure to harmful material, often without the user realizing it. Dark patterns, designed to exploit human psychology, further complicate this by encouraging extended use and data sharing. By understanding these mechanisms and educating children on how they work, parents can empower them to navigate social media with greater awareness and control, ultimately helping to protect their well-being in a rapidly evolving onlife world.
By educating your kids about how algorithms and dark patterns work, you empower them to take control of their social media experience. While platforms are designed to keep users engaged, having the knowledge to recognize these tactics can help young people make smarter choices online and use social media in a more balanced, thoughtful way.
Here’s a great guide we wrote for parents and caregivers on how to reset your child’s algorithms on Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, and Snapchat
Digital Food For Thought
The White Hatter
Facts Not Fear, Facts Not Emotions, Enlighten Not Frighten, Know Tech Not No Tech