Yesterday, a TikTok video went viral on social media, garnering over 9 million views across various platforms. The video shows a young boy having a significant temper tantrum at home, captioned “why you never get your kid an iPad.” To avoid further public traumatization or victimization of the boy involved, we have chosen not to share a link to this video, but rather a blurred out screenshot of the watermark text that we captured. This video has sparked debates among parents online, particularly those who believe that children under the age of 16 should have limited or no access to technology and social media. They are using this video to support their stance, arguing that it illustrates the consequences of such access. One educator commented, “This poor kid clearly had no reasonable boundaries and expectations placed on him (specific to the use of an iPad) and then had a huge negative reaction when his world shifted.”
Recently, we wrote an article as to why children under the age of 6 should not be given devices like iPads as “digital pacifiers” by parents and caregivers (1). However, is the iPad truly the root cause of this incident as suggested in the watermark caption that is seen throughout the video? Is the caption, “why you never get your kid an iPad” an accurate reflection of the situation that we see unfolding in the video?
Here’s what we found after watching the video multiple times:
- The video shows several hard cuts, indicating it was edited.
- The trigger for the tantrum clearly occurred before the video recording started, so the exact cause is unknown.
- The video was recorded by the boy’s sister, not a parent.
- There is no visible or audible presence of a parent in the video. Instead, four youths are present: one filming, one acting out, one sitting on the couch playing a video game, and another walking away at the end of the video.
- The young boy acting out attempts to grab an iPad from the kitchen counter and says, “I want to call daddy,” to which the person recording responds, “nope.” The boy then walks away from the iPad still yelling and screaming.
- The recorder who is laughing tells the boy to “look at the camera,” to which he yells and screams, “NO.”
- A hard cut follows.
- The recorder then says, “you can have the iPad,” likely trying to calm the boy who is now completely out of control.
- At the end of the video, the boy yells at another older child, “I hate you bitch,” as they walk away.
After closely viewing this video, we believe the iPad was not the cause of the tantrum. It appears the boy wanted to use the iPad to contact his father, possibly via FaceTime, as a way to cope with something his older siblings did that clearly upset him.
What this video demonstrates is not the dangers of giving a child an iPad, but rather the importance of understanding the context behind a child’s behavior and the events leading up to it. What this video highlights are the potential negative impacts of sibling dynamics that can sometimes happen when unsupervised by parents.
More importantly, this video also underscores the ethical considerations and the poor digital literacy of the teen(s) who recorded and publicly shared such personal and potentially distressing moments online of their younger brother. In our opinion, this is the issue that that this video clearly demonstrates.
While technology can play a role in a child’s behavior, it is rarely the sole factor. Understanding the broader context and addressing underlying issues are crucial in fostering a healthy environment for children both online and offline. To say, “This poor kid who clearly had no reasonable boundaries and expectations placed on him and then had a huge negative reaction when his world shifted.” is just not fair! In my career I have seen plenty of youth and adults who had excellent boundaries and expectations loose it – been there, done that! Instead, it is more reasonable to conclude that this young person’s “reasonable boundaries and expectations” were breached because of what his brother and sister did to him and not the iPad.
In this case it wasn’t the iPad or the child who was acting out that was the problem, it was likely the older brother and sister who ignited the situation and then decided to use their technology to record it and post it publicly for likes and follows on TikTok, which we would suggest is the real concern!
Digital Food For Thought
The White Hatter
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