Why Restricting Technology Until 16 Will Not Keep Youth and Teens Safer – From “Delay Is The Way” To “Pave The Way”

As parents and caregivers, our top priority is keeping our children safer in today’s onlife world. With growing concerns about the risks of technology and the internet, some advocate for delaying access until high school or even age 16. While this may seem like a protective measure, it can actually have unintended consequences that place youth and teens at greater risk.

The delay approach to technology and the internet may have worked years ago before it became so ubiquitous. However, today, technology is an integral part of modern life. From education to social interaction, young people rely on the internet for communication, learning, and entertainment there is often no way in escaping it. While there are undeniable risks, such as exposure to harmful content, online predators, and cyberbullying to name a few, completely restricting access does not eliminate these dangers. Instead, it often pushes youth and teens toward unmonitored, unregulated digital spaces where they have little to no guidance or protection outside the home.

When youth and teens are banned from using technology, social media, or engaging with digital platforms at home, they don’t stop being curious. Instead, they often seek out access elsewhere, whether through the use of a burner phone, a friend’s device, a public library’s access to the internet, public Wi-Fi, or hidden accounts. These unsupervised spaces lack the parental and caregiver oversight and security settings that could otherwise help mitigate risks. Without guidance, children are left to navigate the online world alone, increasing their exposure to potentially harmful content and situations.

Rather than delaying access until a certain age, a more effective approach is to teach youth and teens how to use technology responsibly, something we call a “pave the way” approach to technology and the internet. Digital literacy is essential, and it involves several key aspects. First, youth and teens need to understand privacy settings and how to protect their personal data. Many young users do not realize the long-term consequences of oversharing information online. By teaching them early, parents and caregivers can help instil habits that promote online safety.

Additionally, recognizing online risks such as scams, predators, and misinformation is critical. The internet is filled with deceptive content, especially today with the increased us of artificial intelligence, and without proper guidance, children may fall victim to online manipulation, predation, exploitation or fraud. Teaching them how to identify red flags and verify sources equips them with the skills to make safer decisions.

Safer and respectful communication is another cornerstone of digital literacy. Youth and teens need to understand the importance of positive interactions online and the potential consequences of cyberbullying, harassment, or inappropriate messaging. Open discussions about responsible behaviour can help prevent negative experiences and promote a culture of kindness.

Equally important is ensuring that youth and teens know where to go for help if they encounter problems online. Whether it’s reporting inappropriate content, blocking harmful users, or reaching out to a trusted adult, kids should feel empowered to take action when needed.

A safer and more effective strategy for introducing technology involves several proactive steps. Early guidance is crucial and introducing age and developmentally appropriate technology under parental or caregiver supervision allows youth and teens to develop safer online habits. This hands-on approach helps them learn how to navigate digital spaces while still having the support and oversight of a caregiver – a “pave the way” approach rather than a “delay is the way” approach.

Open communication within the home plays a vital role in digital safety. Children should feel comfortable discussing their online experiences, asking questions, and seeking help without fear of punishment. When youth and teens are afraid of strict consequences, they are less likely to disclose potential issues, which can increase their vulnerability – something we can attest to anecdotally with the hundreds of teens that have reached out to us for help rather than their parent or caregiver.

Yes, parental controls and boundaries are useful tools but should not replace active parenting. Setting clear expectations about screen use, appropriate online behaviour, and the types of content that are acceptable can provide structure while still allowing youth and teens to explore technology safely. However, these strategies work best when combined with open discussions about their purpose rather than being used as rigid restrictions.

Leading by example is one of the most effective ways to teach responsible digital habits. Children observe how adults engage with technology, so demonstrating mindful social media use, digital etiquette, and balanced screen time can encourage them to adopt similar behaviours.

We acknowledge that technology and the internet come with risks. However, completely restricting youth and teens from using them until the age of 16, or until high school, doesn’t necessarily make them safer. Instead, it can drive our kids toward unmonitored and less secure environments outside the home where protective measures are non-existent.

By guiding and mentoring youth and teens through responsible digital use from an early age, we can help them develop the critical thinking and digital literacy skills they need to navigate the onlife world confidently and securely and build agency in their use of technology. The goal is not to shield children from technology but to equip them with the knowledge and tools to use it wisely in an age and developmentally appropriate way. This is why we created our free web book for parents, “Parenting in an Online World” (1), and offer over 500 free articles like this one on our blog (2) and how-to guides (3) pages on our website to help parents, caregivers, and educators with the information you need to stay informed.

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