Social Comparison & Body Image
Social Comparison is the act of comparing yourself to others in terms of appearance, lifestyle, achievements, or social status—something that is amplified by social media platforms.
Body Image refers to how a person thinks and feels about their own body, including appearance, shape, size, and perceived attractiveness.
Social Comparison and Body Image
Adolescence is a time of heightened body image concerns, especially for younger teen girls. Having presented to over 560,000 pre-teens and teens across Canada and the United States, we can confidently say that media—across all forms—is having a significant emotional, psychological, physical, and social impact on many youth when it comes to body image and social comparison.
In September 2021, The Wall Street Journal reported that they had reviewed internally produced research slides by Facebook, which stated: “We [Facebook] make body image issues worse for one in three teen girls” and “Thirty-two percent of teen girls said that when they felt bad about their bodies, Instagram made them feel worse.”
It’s important to recognize that this challenge affects youth regardless of their gender identity. However, research suggests the impact is more significant among teens who identify as female.
Given the increased use of social media by teens, there is no doubt that “people come to think of themselves in the way they believe others think of them”—a psychological concept known as reflective appraisal. Research makes it clear: identity can be directly shaped by how others perceive us. While social comparison is a natural developmental process, social media has the ability to distort what is real and what is not.
Parents must understand that during the pre-teen and teen years, body image concerns are very real and cannot be ignored or minimized. We need to reflect: body image mattered to us when we were teens too, but we didn’t have the amplification of social media to contend with. Understanding this fact and having open, honest discussions with your child is critically important in today’s onlife/online world.
The Social Message of Weight & Body Image
The media’s message: “Thin is in.” Because of this messaging, many youth—especially those who identify as female—become preoccupied with how their peers perceive them, often leading to negative social comparisons and outcomes like eating disorders. Source
The media’s portrayal of the ideal female body image includes:
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Hourglass figure – large breasts, small waist, large butt
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Toned, but not too muscular
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Thigh gap
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Long legs
The media’s portrayal of the ideal male body image includes:
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Tanned or darkened skin
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Chiseled, lean, toned muscles
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Six-pack abs
A friend in the health supplement industry told us he's seen a significant rise in male teens purchasing pre- and post-workout protein powders. Many of these products are marketed to reduce body fat and promote muscle gain. A growing concern: the use of steroids—not for athletic performance, but for appearance—without understanding the medical risks.
In fact, a 2023 Canadian study found a rise in muscle dysmorphia among Canadian boys and young men. https://thewhitehatter.ca/blog/social-media-and-body-image-challenges-a-growing-concern-for-teen-boys-as-well/
The Social Message of Beauty
The “Kardashian effect” is real. Amanda Mozea, Education Outreach Manager for MediaGirls, found that female beauty is often portrayed in media as including:
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Big eyes
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Small nose
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Big lips
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Small chin
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Strong cheekbones
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Dramatic eyebrows
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Blemish-free and scar-free skin
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Thick, shiny, frizz-free hair
Pre-teen and teen boys are also becoming increasingly image-conscious. The skincare and cosmetics industry now markets directly to males with products like facial scrubs, moisturizers, AHA peels, and facial oils becoming more mainstream.
The media’s portrayal of male beauty includes:
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Well-groomed hair
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Blemish-free, moisturized skin
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Hairless bodies – “Manscaped”
We know that toxic online influences can significantly affect self-esteem, especially among young girls. According to MediaSmart, 80% of 13–16-year-olds are more likely to buy a product from an online influencer. MediaSmart Source
Here are a few excellent resources to help you start conversations with your teen:
The Results of Social Comparison
Social comparison is a natural process that continues into adulthood. For teens, identity is often tied to how others perceive them. Many influencers teens follow online frequently morph or stage their images to sell beauty products.
As supermodel Cindy Crawford once said, “I wish I looked like Cindy Crawford,” acknowledging that even her photos were edited to unrealistic standards.
To replicate these skewed ideals, many teens spend hours getting “camera ready” for that one “perfect picture.” These photos are often filtered or digitally altered to enhance big eyes, small noses, dramatic eyebrows, blemish-free skin, and hourglass body proportions.
👉 Steve Aoki’s “Pretender” Music Video illustrates this issue well.
Of even greater concern is the rising number of young people turning to cosmetic surgery to meet unrealistic appearance standards. A 2021 study titled Effects of social media use on desire for cosmetic surgery among young women found:
“The results showed that viewing images of females who had undergone cosmetic enhancements affected young women’s desire for cosmetic surgery—especially if they spent significant time on social media, followed many accounts, and were dissatisfied with their appearance.”
From our own anecdotal experience, teen girls aged 14–16 are more focused on how they appear online and how others perceive them, while boys tend to post more about what they’re doing. For girls, this can result in overwhelming pressure to conform to perceived beauty standards. The core question becomes: Who is dictating these standards?
The answer, too often, is online influencers and hypersexualized media.
Girls today face a troubling binary choice:
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Conform to these social norms, which often leads to more likes, followers, and social acceptance, or
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Not conform, which may lead to social invisibility or being ghosted.
During these critical identity-forming years, the pressure to meet social expectations can lead to anxiety, insecurity, depression, and more.
Pre-Internet vs. Now
Before the internet, social norms were mostly dictated by immediate peer groups and media like TV or magazines. Today’s teens face a 24/7 digital feedback loop from the juggernaut of social media. The message we should give our youth is:
“You are the best you in the entire world—don’t let anyone else tell you differently.”
But that message is hard to believe when influencers and media are constantly suggesting:
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“You’d be better if you looked like me.”
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“Dress like me.”
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“Act like me.”
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“Use this product.”
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“Take this pill or supplement.”
While we advocate for responsible and empowered social media use, we also acknowledge that excessive use can skew perceptions and lead to unhealthy behaviours.
Boys Struggle Too
In a 2022 article by health psychologist and body image scientist Charlotte Markey: Read the article
“Boys (and many of us adults, too) tend to think body dissatisfaction only plagues girls. But research suggests otherwise. Seventy-five percent of adolescent boys are dissatisfied with their bodies. Up to half are using supplements like protein powders, believing it will boost their muscularity… Boys are suffering, but they seem to mostly be suffering in silence.”
No matter the youth’s gender identity or sexual orientation, if they are experiencing negative body image, this 2023 research offers hope: 2023 Study
“Reducing social media usage is a feasible method for producing short-term positive effects on body image among vulnerable users and should be evaluated as a potential treatment component for body image-related disturbances.”
Final Thoughts
Here’s an eye-opening documentary that explores how TikTok is amplifying cosmetic surgery culture among youth. We highly recommend watching it with your teen. [Note: Some images may be disturbing.]
Peer validation is important to teens. If parents aren't attuned to what’s happening in their child’s onlife/online world—especially around social comparison and reflective appraisal—it can lead to harmful outcomes such as:
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Eating disorders
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Body dysmorphia
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Anxiety and depression
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Even self-harm
We’ve spoken about this issue for years in our school presentations, and our message remains the same:
“You are the best you in the entire world—don’t let anyone else tell you differently.”